As a man that was sexually assaulted, where can I get help right now?
If you are in serious need of help please contact our helpline on 078 457 4911MatrixMen has group sessions in both Cape Town and Johannesburg. Once you have had an initial interview, you will be invited to join one of our groups.
As a victim will I become an abuser, what if I have already abused?
Society has long cast the myth that once you have been a victim of sexual abuse, you will become an abuser. This is not entirely true. Research has shown that approximately 7% of victims will go on to abuse.
If you feel that you are possibly an abuser, please contact us and we will assist you to control your feelings and emotions.
What are the effects of sexual abuse on me as an adult?
The effects are varied and vast. Many men will resort to addictive behaviours to help mask the pain of childhood abuse. Alcohol, as a legal substance is one of the most popular ones. Other men will resort to, drug use, porn, sexually acting out, workaholic, gym, etc. Anything that prevents you from not being present in your life or the lives of your children, is of concern. Anger and rage are also a common side effect of the abused child.
How do I reach out?
Whatever your situation, we suggest that you reach out to get support at some point in time. The issues of childhood abuse have a tendency to not ‘go away’ as so many people say, but rather tend to cycle in your subconscious until you reach a breaking point. It is best to not let things spiral out of control, but to rather ask for support when memories first begin to surface.
Many men will try to bury these feelings using alcohol, drugs or sexually acting out.
None of these are a permanent solution to the issue that you currently face.
Why do I feel so much shame?
You are not alone. Lots of men have suffered the same fate. This might not console you, but knowing that you are not alone can be comforting. Sadly what you are feeling is as a result of societal misinformation.
Society tells us that Boys cant be abused
Men are supposed to be strong enough to defend themselves.
Men are able to resist temptation, and not get erect when they are abused by someone that they don’t like.
Men sometimes feel that they enjoyed it because they ejaculated.