Our sole pur­pose is to raise aware­ness about male sur­vivors of sex­u­al abuse. The aim we have is to empow­er men that have been vic­tims of sex­u­al abuse to get per­mis­sion to heal through hear­ing the sto­ries of men that have been through the same as they have. We want men to hear that they are not alone, they are not the only ones.

As a man that was sex­u­al­ly assault­ed, where can I get help right now?

If you are in seri­ous need of help please con­tact our helpline on 078 457 4911MatrixMen has group ses­sions in both Cape Town and Johan­nes­burg.  Once you have had an ini­tial inter­view, you will be invit­ed to join one of our groups.

As a vic­tim will I become an abuser, what if I have already abused?

Soci­ety has long cast the myth that once you have been a vic­tim of sex­u­al abuse, you will become an abuser.  This is not entire­ly true. Research has shown that approx­i­mate­ly 7% of vic­tims will go on to abuse.
If you feel that you are pos­si­bly an abuser, please con­tact us and we will assist you to con­trol your feel­ings and emotions.

 

What are the effects of sex­u­al abuse on me as an adult?

The effects are var­ied and vast. Many men will resort to addic­tive behav­iours to help mask the pain of child­hood abuse.  Alco­hol, as a legal sub­stance is one of the most pop­u­lar ones.  Oth­er men  will resort to, drug use, porn, sex­u­al­ly act­ing out, worka­holic, gym, etc.  Any­thing that pre­vents you from not being present in your life or the lives of your chil­dren, is of con­cern. Anger and rage are also a com­mon side effect of the abused child.

How do I reach out?

What­ev­er your sit­u­a­tion, we sug­gest that you reach out to get sup­port at some point in time.  The issues of child­hood abuse have a ten­den­cy to not ‘go away’ as so many peo­ple say, but rather tend to cycle in your sub­con­scious until you reach a break­ing point.  It is best to not let things spi­ral out of con­trol, but to rather ask for sup­port when mem­o­ries first begin to surface.
Many men will try to bury these feel­ings using alco­hol, drugs or sex­u­al­ly act­ing out.
None of these are a per­ma­nent solu­tion to the issue that you cur­rent­ly face.

Why do I feel so much shame?

You are not alone. Lots of men have suf­fered the same fate. This might not con­sole you, but know­ing that you are not alone can be com­fort­ing.  Sad­ly what you are feel­ing is as a result of soci­etal misinformation.
Soci­ety tells us that Boys cant be abused
Men are sup­posed to be strong enough to defend themselves.

Men are able to resist temp­ta­tion, and not get erect when they are abused by some­one that they don’t like.
Men some­times feel that they enjoyed it because they ejaculated.